Thanksgiving - can you believe it?

Well, another year has almost come to an end. Thanksgiving is today. I have several things ALREADY that I am thankful for today!

First and foremost, Shawn let me sleep in til 930am! That is something I haven't done in, well, I can't even remember - seriously!!! Second, he cooked a wonderful breakfast, to which I added waffles as I was having a craving. After I ate, my wonderful son, Jack came over and just layed on top of me - "giving me some love" as we call it. I usually have to beg, but today, he just did it on his own. I was laying there and realized that though I had slept in, I was still exhausted. So, Shawn let me go back to bed and I slept from 10:45 till 1pm!!! I haven't felt this rested since probably before I ever had any kids. It is strange! It is amazing what sleep can do for the soul!!! So, Thank you Shawn for taking care of the kids this morning to I could rejuvinate.....it was much needed and appreciated! Those were the little things for today.

The bigger things....well, even with all the adversity I have been facing over the last almost three years, I do have a lot to be thankful for. I have a roof over my head (not owned, but at least the ability to still rent and keep my kids warm and clothed). I have a good job which helps me pay all these bills that are coming in...so what if I am still in the hole every month - can you imagine if I was only able to work at Taco Bell or somthing similar? What would happen to my children. I am thankful that I have a career, or a "trade", where I could get a new job tomorrow if I was let go at my current practice - in this economy many many people are not as fortunate. I am thankful to have Jack, a wonderfully sweet child with a heart of gold and stamina - do not forget that everything that has happened over the last three years - has happened to him too. He does not get the attention he deserves, simply due to lack of time and his sister's disabilities, but he pushes on and got an award for being one of the most compassionate kids in his first grade class. And sense of humor - OMG - he keeps me going on the real hard days. I am thankful to have a wonderful boyfriend who accepts my children as his own, and who has the patience of a saint (most days). He puts up with me and my anger and depression that often rear their ugly heads when times are hard or when I get too wrapped up in all the red tape of advocating for my daughter. And finally, I am thankful, most of all, believe it or not, for my daughter, Julia. She has taught me so much about so many different things. She has led me to be more proactive, she has lead me to open my heart to others in need, she has taught me empathy for others in similar situations. She has taught me unconditional love. She has it for me, even when I get aggravated with the system, with her, etc, which does happen more often than I would like to admit. :) And I have unconditional love for her. I was speaking to some friends at work yesterday who told me that they are amazed at everything I am doing on her behalf and that they can't imagine trying to fit it all into a 24 hour day or a seven day week, but I do, week after week, after week....and you know why? Because I love my daughter more than anyone would ever believe and I want her to have the best chance at life. The decisions I make are for her. Some people think these decisions are wrong, because of the consequences on my finances, but these decisions are for her!!! I will live in a shack if I have to to keep doing what I do for HER. BECAUSE I LOVE HER and will do whatever I can to protect her and to hopefully improve her condition. Do I get frustrated with her? Yes I do. Anyone who has spent any amount of time gets frustrated with her, but WE all know it is NOT her fault for acting out the way she does. Her brain is broken. I am THANKFUL that I am able to try to make it better so she can be a more productive member of society - no matter what it does to my finances. When her settlement comes through - in about a year - things will change for the better for all of us - and I can start digging myself out of this hole....until then, I will continue. I am thankful for the people that chose to help with this, as they understand what the reasons are.

Your family is not just your blood family. Your family includes those who you choose to be a part of your life - and I love my "family" and am thankful for their support and friendship.

Go eat turkey everyone - especially YOU Makenzie - so glad she is eating again (though small amounts) after almost three years.. YOU GO GIRL!

Susan